The Ties that Cannot be Broken
by Adeliade
Summary: Merlin has been taken and Arthur is determined to find him. But what has happened? Why was he kidnapped and who took him? Rated T for graphic images later in the story.
1. Chapter 1

_**Right so this is my first fanfiction ever and I'm a little bit embarrassed to post my... bad writing online but I have big plans for this. Set before season 5 under the assumption that over the years Merlin has had many more adventures with Arthur and his friends.**_

_Update! I forgot the burn from Nimuh on his chest so I added that in._

_It's been four months_. Arthur thought to himself as he mindlessly drummed his gloved fingers against the polished wood of his throne. _Four months of tireless searching and nothing to show for it._

Taking a deep breath Arthur thought back to the incident that had ended up consuming most of his waking hours since it took place.

"This is hopeless." Merlin announced as he, Arthur, and several other knights made their way through the dense summer foliage of the woods.

They had been hunting for nearly three days and had not even caught a glimpse of a deer or rabbit and as much as it pained Arthur to admit, he was beginning to agree with Merlin on this one. The king snorted with humorless laughter. The heat must be getting to him to be agreeing with _Mer_lin.

"I could go for a nice tankard of ale right now." Gwaine said to the right of Merlin. As per custom, the knights had to wear their chainmail on official hunts, which was making the trip extremely uncomfortable given the horrendous heat wave that had hit Camelot about a week before.

"You could always go for a tankard of ale!" A large knight urged his horse to overtake Gwaine's. "I'm actually marveling at the fact that you're sober right now."

Gwaine reached out to hit Percival as he rode past but was too slow and nearly slipped sideways off of his horse in the process.

Arthur listened to the ruckus behind him with mild annoyance. Normally the king would partake in the playful banter between the knights but the unbearable heat had left him in a foul mood.

"Will you all shut-up? You're going to scare away anything worth hunting!" Arthur finally snapped in frustration. Group fell silent. Arthur felt bad for yelling at them but the hunt was going poorly and they had been out in the forest for a day longer than expected, yet still had nothing to show for it.

"Princess is grumpy!" Gwaine mumbled under his breath, his trademark grin spreading across his face. Merlin laughed and Arthur wondered how they could be so happy and joke in such heat. But then again Merlin was not forced to wear the heavy chainmail like the rest of them, just his normal clothing, though it was strange that he chose to wear his heavy jacket that the King hardly ever saw his manservant without.

"Sire, there is a stream not far ahead. I suggest that we water the horses and camp for the night." Sir Leon spoke for the first time from the back of the small group. He seemed to be feeling the effects of the head more than the others because he had hardly said two words for most of the trip.

Not wanting to stop until they had hunted something, but worried for the sake of his men and horses, Arthur reluctantly agreed. Everyone looked relieved to be able to rest, none more than Gwaine, who upon hearing news of the stream set his horse to the fastest pace the tired animal could manage through the thick foliage and ran ahead of the group.

When Arthur and the rest of the party reached the stream they saw Gwaine's horse drinking greedily but the carefree knight was nowhere to be seen.

"Gwaine?" Arthur called out tiredly. The last thing that the weary king needed was for the fool to wander off alone. His call went unanswered and a wave of worry began to wash over Arthur when he heard Merlin giggling inanely a ways up the stream.

"What are you idiots doing?" Arthur asked skeptically as he dismounted own horse and paced over to where Merlin was now rolling on the ground with laughter. Something was poking out from the shallow, slow moving waters of the stream.

It was Gwaine. He was wearing only his leggings, completely submerged in the water except for his nose. His cheerful face was contorted to mimic that of a fish. Arthur actually had to hold back the laugh that he felt bubble up inside when he saw the knight behaving so silly. The heat must really be getting to him.

Arthur dipped his boot into the water and splashed some over Gwaine's nose. The knight sat up and gasped, wiping his long dark hair out of his eyes.

"What was that for?" Merlin had managed to stop laughing for the time being.

Arthur rolled his eyes dramatically. "For being an idiot." Though he could not deny that imitating a fish was foolish Arthur could not deny that submerging himself in the cool water was a pleasing thought.

After a moment of hesitation the king began to pull off his own chainmail. He struggled to get the heavy garment off. Suddenly there was an expert set of hand helping him pull off his clothing. It was Merlin, apparently recovered from his laughing fit and finally doing something useful.

"Finally you do something useful." Arthur voiced his thoughts.

Merlin chuckled under his breath as he stripped the king of his protective under jacket. "At least I can take off my own clothing."

When Merlin turned to set the jacket on top of the chainmail Arthur took the opportunity to pull off one of his boots and chuck it at his servant's head. It hit and bounced off with a dull thwack. Merlin froze in place, leaving Arthur to stand there with a satisfied grin on his face.

The king pulled off his own tunic and other boot quickly. He jumped into the water next to Gwaine, who had watched the little exchange with a stupid smile on his face. They were joined a moment later by Sir Leon who had snuck up from behind to splash the two already in the water.

"You all look like children." Percival called from nearby. He had removed his chainmail but left his tunic and boots on, obviously having no intention of getting in the water too.

"Oh don't be such a stick in the mud!" Gwaine called back as he splashed water in the other knight's direction.

Regardless of how it looked, Arthur could not deny that the cool water felt great on his hot skin.

"Merlin why don't you join us?" The king called to his servant who looked like he was contemplating throwing his royal boots in to the stream.

"No thanks." There was a strange hint of panic in Merlin's voice that Arthur found strange.

"Oh come on don't tell me that you're afraid of the water?"

"No I just prefer to not look like a ridiculous fish, that's all."

Arthur pondered it for a moment. "You're afraid to take off your shirt aren't you?"

In all the years that Merlin had been Arthur's servant he had only seen him take off his shirt once and that was only because they had dressed him up as a knight to be bait for a bandit trap.

"No!" Merlin said, a little too quickly.

A strange, mischievous smile split across Arthur's face. When Merlin turned to fold the discarded tunic that the king had thrown to the ground Arthur motioned to Percival who was watching from afar. Percival looked from the smiling king to Merlin and broke out in a grin.

"Oh come on," Arthur continued, obviously taunting Merlin, "You shouldn't be embarrassed just because you don't have a perfect body like the rest of us."

Merlin laughed sarcastically and mumbled something under his breath. Arthur cupped his hand behind his ear. "What was that?"

"Nothing!" Merlin quickly retorted.

"No it was something. Merlin I order you to repeat yourself."

"Fine." His manservant smacked the folded tunic on the ground. "I said at least I'm not putting any more holes in my belt!"

"I am not fat!" Arthur exploded, looking down at his own exposed torso. Sure he had put on a little bit more weight since assuming the throne but his stomach was still flat with not even the slightest hint of a paunch.

Gwaine laughed loudly and sent a splash of water over Arthur's midsection.

Merlin stood on the bank with a satisfied grin on his face that quickly faded when Percival, who he had not noticed sneaking up behind him, grabbed the shoulders of the servant's coat and tugged it off.

"No wait what are you doing?" Merlin asked, clearly panicked as he struggled against Percival who was now working to pull off his tunic.

"Come have some fun Merlin! Nothing to be embarrassed about!" Arthur laughed loudly from the stream at the sight unfolding in front of him. Merlin was no match for the huge knight that he struggled against and in almost no time Percival had forced off the servant's old blue tunic.

Arthur was not sure what he was expecting of Merlin's body. Scrawny, yes. Pale? Definitely. But there was something… off. It took the king a few moments to pinpoint exactly what the problem was because it never stuck him as strange before, at least not when he was with the knights. Merlin had scars all over his lean frame.

Arthur knew about the scar on his left chest, he had been there when his servant took the blow that caused it but it was not the only one marring Merlin's pale body. There were many more. A huge pink knot on his lower back, a slash on his side, the distinct mark of a large, circular burn on his chest and countless small lines of healed tissue dotted his chest, stomach and back. Not to mention the yellowing bruise just below his ribs.

It was only a moment that Merlin stood exposed before he angrily grabbed his tunic from a stunned Percival and hastily slipped it back over his head.

"Merlin, mate…" Gwaine started to say as he stood up from the water.

Arthur just sat there, shocked. How could Merlin have such wounds? He was only a servant; surely his work wasn't that dangerous.

Merlin just adjusted his neckerchief to sit above his tunic and looked away from the gawking men sheepishly.

_Neckerchief!_ Arthur thought to himself. _He wears a neckerchief! How could a man who wears a neckerchief have that many scars?_

"You'd think that I was a woman or something the way you all are gawking." Merlin smiled and shook his head almost… knowingly. He seemed anxious to get the attention off of himself. "Anyway I better go collect wood for a fire."

The knights and befuddled king just stared at each other, mouths open, speechless at what they had just seen. Merlin bore scars that would put the most hardened warrior to shame and he was… a _servant. _

Suddenly a muffled scream brought the men out of their stupor. Arthur watched in horror as Merlin dropped the few sticks he had managed to gather and staggered forward. There was something sticking out of his side that the servant tried to wrap his hands around before he fell to his knees.

"MERLIN!" Arthur was out of the stream in an instant, wishing that he had not taken off the protective chainmail. It only took a moment to get to where Merlin had fallen. Only a single moment. But Merlin was gone.

The only thing remaining was a few drops of blood and a note, written on yellowed canvas and rolled into a tight bundle.

Arthur ripped the note open and read through the few lines of beautifully written text over and over.

"Greetings dear brother,

I'll be borrowing this for a while. Don't worry. Your precious Merlin is in good hands."

Through his anger and shock one name floated through Arthur's mind, a name so vile that it escaped the king's mouth like bile rising from his gullet.

"Morgana."


	2. Chapter 2

**I'm going to try to update daily but who knows... life tends to make everything harder -sigh- But for now, more!**

The sound of doors being pushed open brought Arthur out of his thoughts as Sir Gwaine and Sir Elyan walked into the council room with purpose in their step. They had looks of… something that Arthur hadn't seen in a long time. They looked hopeful.

"Sire. We've found him." Leon's words echoed in the king's mind. He had been waiting for this moment for so long yet now that it was actually upon him he was suddenly unsure of what to do.

"Where?" His words were no more than a whisper, betraying the careful façade that he had worked so hard to put up in the past few months. He had tried to take Merlin's disappearance in stride. To look kingly and composed but lately it had been harder and harder to deny the guilt and sorrow that consumed his every waking moment.

Leon bowed before Arthur, a gesture that he had seemed to have forgotten in his elation. "A forest, sire. North of Camelot, just over the border of Odin's territory. A few villagers said that they've seen Morgana coming and going in the past few months.

Arthur settled back in his chair, unsure of how he came to be leaning forward in the first place. It was too early to get his hopes up. Morgana may not even be holding Merlin in the forest. Merlin might not even be alive anymore.

"Send riders immediately. Our best men." Leon bowed and turned to inform the rest of the knights when Arthur stopped him.

"Oh and Leon," A hint of amusement, the first in a very long time, crept into the king's voice. "Fetch Gwaine from the tavern too."

With that Leon and Elyan were gone, the great wooden doors of the council closed behind them. Arthur let out a relieved sigh, one that he had been holding back for many months. If they've found Morgana then it means that they'll find Merlin, and if we find Merlin then he'll be alright. That was one thing that the King was absolutely sure of. Merlin was always alright. It just took finding him sometimes.

Arthur had expected Gwen to protest when he made his motives to go after Morgana clear but she simply stood by the window, watching the men in the courtyard below. After a few moments of silence Arthur saw a tear fall from her chocolate brown eye and slip down her dark cheek.

"You'll bring him home, won't you Arthur?"

The words caused a deep pain to stir in Arthur's chest. Gwen had not taken Merlin's disappearance well. She had known Merlin since he first arrived in Camelot and the two had shared much over the years. He could only imagine the loss that she had felt during his absence.

"I will. I promise." Arthur crossed the room and wound his strong arms around Gwen's thin waist. She turned her face to look up at his, concern evident in her dark eyes. "Everything is going to be fine."

The words had been spoken more than once in the time that Merlin had been missing. _Everything's going to be fine._ But they were not words of comfort. They never were. How could they be? Everything was not going to be fine and Arthur knew it better than most. Even if he did manage to bring Merlin back who knows what Morgana would have done to him in the time that he was held captive? Four months can change a man, even one as stupidly loyal as Merlin.

Gwen's soft lips on his own brought Arthur out of his thoughts. For a moment, in her arms, his troubled melted away.

"I must go." Arthur finally parted from his queen with a soft kiss on the cheek.

"Be careful my lord." Gwen whispered longingly from the window as Arthur grabbed his sword belt off the table and ducked out of the room.

Gaius was standing next to the group of knights in the courtyard when Arthur emerged from the castle. The past few months had not been good on the old man. He did not openly grieve, no one did, but he stood with more of a hunch, and always wore the same sad, lonely expression.

"Gaius." Arthur greeted the old physician with false cheer.

"Sire." Gaius watched the men pack their horses for the journey ahead. At first he said nothing and Arthur was about to excuse himself when he finally spoke. "I care for Merlin like my own son. Please, do whatever you can to bring him back."

His words seemed strangely void of emotion for such a serious request. Years of training to deliver news of death and keeping calm in the face of tragedy had trained the old man for moments like these. Arthur didn't know what to say at first.

Finally, realizing that words were not enough, the king just clapped his gloved hand on Gaius's shoulder and looked into the physician's crooked eyes. Nothing more needed to be said.

His horse was already saddled and waiting when Arthur made his way over to the group of men who were preparing to depart as well. Among them were familiar faces, Sir Leon, Sir Percival, Sir Elyan, and of course, Gwaine, who looked like he had spent the last four months in the tavern.

"Princess!" Gwaine exclaimed so loud that it caused Arthur's ears to vibrate. The knight was obviously drunk. He moved to pull the king in for a hug but Arthur sidestepped at the last moment leaving the long-haired man to fall onto the cobbled stones of the courtyard.

"Wh-atya d'fur?" Gwaine rubbed his nose, looking hurt. Arthur sighed heavily.

"Percival, get him on his horse will you? Strap him down if necessary." Percival, a monster of a man, stepped forward and heaved the drunken knight to his feet. Gwaine laughed and swayed unsteadily.

"Whurwe gun?" Gwaine protested as Percival and Leon helped him up on his horse.

"To rescue-" Leon started but stopped as Gwaine tipped dangerously to one side of the saddle. He pushed him back up, sending him over towards Percival. "We're going to rescue Merlin."

Gwaine instantly sobered at the sound of his friend's name. "Merlin!?" He whipped his head around as though Merlin would be there with them.

By the time that the other knights had managed to settle Gwaine down Arthur's horse was already prancing excitedly by the castle gate, breath billowing out of its nose in the cold fall air.

"We don't have much time before night falls. Let us make haste!" The king urged his horse forward and the other knights fell in line, two by two behind him. Well, all except for Gwaine, who seemed to momentarily forget how to make his horse go forward and took several seconds of flustering to follow.

Arthur glanced back just as the courtyard was disappearing from view. Gaius stood in the same spot as before, motionless. It was too far to tell but Arthur was sure that he could see tears on the old man's cheeks.

He was going to bring Merlin home.

* * *

Merlin opened his eyes to the dim light from a fire burning on a filthy hearth. His first thoughts were to glance over at his fellow captive. She lay motionless against the wall, arms lifted over her head from the shackles that kept her there.

He did not know how long they had both been captive. Maybe days, maybe weeks. It was hard to keep time when he was unable to see any sort of light other than the fire. He did know who his captor was though; oh he knew that all too well.

Morgana was an unpleasant host to say the least. Merlin tried to adjust himself to be a bit more comfortable but the young warlock's struggles were all but in vain. He was hanging from a chain above him, wrists clasped in irons that were far too small and cut into his skin. The worst part was that Morgana had decided to make his life a little bit more interesting by hoisting the chains up too high for Merlin to be able to stand comfortably. His only choices were to stand on the front of his feet or dangle from his arms, which burned painfully.

But the worst part of everything, the part that sent panic up Merlin's spine was that Morgana had not done anything to him. _She hadn't touched him_, at least not yet. He would just watch her come and go from what he assumed was some sort of hovel, judging by the dirt walls, and wait.

Merlin knew that he couldn't use magic to get him out of this. If Morgana found out that he was actually Emrys then the consequences would be dire. But he was concerned for his fellow captive, as she had not moved or said a word since he arrived, however that might be. At first Merlin had wondered if she was dead but the steady rise and fall of her chest told him that she was merely asleep, or unconscious.

The door to the hovel opened again and Morgana entered, carrying a bundle of firewood. Merlin noticed how terrible she looked, almost unrecognizable from the beautiful lady that he had met years earlier. Her once beautiful black hair was tangled to the point where Merlin wondered if she had bothered combing it at all during the time that he had not seen her. And her skin, which was always pale, had taken on a sickening greyish hue from lack of sun.

"Oh. Merlin. You're awake." Morgana's voice was falsely sweet. Just hearing it made Merlin's stomach flip with anger.

The young warlock tried to adjust himself once more so that the irons holding him up did not cut into his wrist so.

"Awh not so comfortable are we?" Morgana set the wood down by the fire and made her way across the small space to Merlin. She placed a cold hand on his chest, which he, for the first time, realized was bare.

Merlin did not respond. For someone as vile as Morgana did not deserve a response. He shivered slightly as she ran her icy fingers up his chest to his neck.

"We're going to be like that then?" In a swift, painful motion Morgana grabbed Merlin's chin and forced it up. The young warlock was reminded of a time, years ago when Morgana had held him captive, then tried to use him to kill Arthur. He just managed to escape murdering the one person who he was destined to protect and had thought that he had killed the evil witch but apparently he was mistaken.

Morgana stared into Merlin's unblinking eyes. After a moment her brow furrowed. "We've been down this road before, haven't we?"

Then Merlin did something that surprised even him. He spat in Morgana's face. She let go of his face and stood motionless for a moment with a look of disbelief on her cold face.

If Merlin regretted the act when he actually did it, it was nothing compared to the regret that he felt a moment later when Morgana pulled something silver from her belt and plunged it angrily into Merlin's hip.

The warlock started to scream, but stopped himself, turning it into a hiss of air that slid out through his clenched jaw. _Morgana did not deserve a response._

The lack of screaming sent Morgana into a frenzy of anger. She stabbed him several more times, and then ran the sharp blade of the dagger across his chest. When she was finished the witch took a step back with a satisfied grin on her face.

Merlin still did not make any noise except for the short bursts of air he let through his mouth. Then he did something else that he would come to regret. He looked up with determined eyes and met Morgana's gaze. The young warlock and deranged witch stared into each other's eyes for a long time, at least to Merlin it felt like an eternity.

Her stare was cold, unforgiving, but most of all, it was filled with pure insanity. This was no longer Morgana, the king king's ward he had met what felt like so long ago. This was a being of pure evil.

"You dare… You insolent little…" Morgana seemed at a loss for words. Merlin could see that his actions were just making her angrier, but if he dropped his gaze now it would mean that she had won, and he definitely wasn't going to allow that to happen.

There was a sudden bright flash of light and something struck Merlin's chest so hard that he feared his ribs were broken. He let out a little cough but bit back the scream that was threatening to claw its way out of his tortured throat.

_Morgana does not deserve a response._

Merlin let himself dangle from the chains above, barely feeling the edge cut into the soft skin on his wrists.

"Heal him!" Merlin looked up with confusion, unsure of what the deranged witch had just said.

Morgana was standing over the unconscious woman chained up a few paces away. Only the woman was not unconscious anymore. She was staring down at the dirt below her with a strange expression on her face, and then suddenly she turned her head to Merlin with a look of what could only be pure terror.

This confused Merlin. Had he done something to this woman in the past? She was obviously no friend to Morgana but that didn't change the fact that she was looking at Merlin as though he was holding a sword to her neck.

Morgana kicked the woman with a bare foot and again repeated her demand. "Heal him!" The woman looked from Morgana to Merlin sadly. The scene playing out before him was starting to get strangely blurry despite the lack of change of light in the room.

Blood loss. Merlin almost chuckled to himself when he remembered his wounds. That is what the slight dripping sound he's been hearing was. His blood flowing into the dirt below. He was going to die, and the thought for some reason didn't scare him as much as he always thought that it would.

The woman stood at Morgana's request, now unchained from the wall. Merlin eyed the pair suspiciously. Morgana… well the shell of Morgana, looked as evil as always but the woman, she looked… genuine. As she approached the young warlock he felt a strange, yet familiar sensation in his head.

_I am sorry Emrys. _Merlin gasped when he heard her voice, so gentile, so sincere. Yet she had not opened her mouth when she spoke.

_You're a druid?_ He pushed back. It was a stupid question but the blood dripping from him was making Merlin increasingly weaker and less aware.

I am sorry Emrys. The woman repeated once more as she stuck out a hand and placed it on Merlin's exposed chest.

In an instant, he knew what she was doing. The familiar feel of magic washed over the young warlock's body, flowing into his wounds and repairing them. There was a strange pop that nearly caused Merlin to fall into unconsciousness with pain. It was a second before he was able to register that his rib had just been put back into place.

Despite being healing magic having ones wounds repaired instantly is not painless. In fact the act of healing can cause just as much, or more, pain than the actual wounds themselves. Merlin felt this pain in every fiber of his being as the woman worked. Yet, he still did not cry out, choosing instead to clench his jaw so tight that he thought his teeth would break until it was over.

When she was finished, the woman returned to her spot on the wall and put her arms up willingly to be chained. Merlin caught a glimpse of a druid symbol on her wrist through the haze of pain still surrounding him.

Morgana patted the woman's head with fake empathy and turned back to Merlin. He was beginning to feel the all-too familiar grasp of unconsciousness creep up in the corners of his eyes when Morgana grabbed his chin again.

"Did you like that, Merlin?" She spat out his name like poison. "There's more where that came from until you're willing to talk." Morgana tightened her grip on Merlin's chin as an evil smile began to spread across her pale face.

"Oh, and Merlin. Do you know how long you've been here?"

Merlin was suddenly terrified, though he hoped he didn't show it. He didn't want to know. Surely it had been a long time? It felt like an eternity.

"Two. Days." Morgana laughed at the obvious signs of distress on Merlin's face and pushed his head back.

Merlin felt his head fall back and the shackles cut into his wrist as he slowly drifted off into the welcomed release of unconsciousness.

**Wow that was pretty terrible I know my writing skills are a little rusty but... Anyway, I hope you'll ignore the terrible writing and stay tuned.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Urg I re-read the previous chapters and noticed a lot of mistakes that I should fix... But alas, I'm too lazy :) Anyway, if you get confused about the time-line here I'll explain at the bottom.**

_Fourth months_. Arthur repeated in his head over and over again as he rode. _Four months of Morgana._ The battle-hardened king shuddered at the thought of what Merlin must have endured, and might still be. He wished to gallop ahead of the rest of the men in order to reach his faithful servant faster but he had to keep up his careful mask of composure.

He could not let anyone know just how worried he was for Merlin; it would do nothing for the situation. Besides, given the ruckus that Gwaine was making at the rear of the procession showed that he was worried enough for everyone there.

By the time that Gwaine was on his 163rd idea of how he'd kill Morgana, night had started to fall. Arthur did not want to stop. He wanted to keep going, to save Merlin as quickly as possible – but he knew that his men needed to rest if they were going to take on someone as fierce as Morgana in only a few short hours.

_Morgana. Fierce._ Arthur shook his head at the thought. Morgana had always been strong-willed and a presence in a room but he still had trouble fathoming the monster that she had become. It was not long ago that the two were like siblings, before they found out that they actually were siblings, but those days were long over.

"Sire?" Sir Leon pulled his horse beside the preoccupied king's. "I suggest that we rest for the night. I fear that we have a long day ahead of us tomorrow."

Arthur was reluctant to withdraw from his thoughts but realized that the woods around them had plunged into almost complete darkness. "Right. Yes." He said, still preoccupied with his own musings.

Leon seemed to sense that the king was not going to take charge of the situation and set out to accomplish the daunting task of getting camp up in his place. Gwaine was still loud and obnoxious but it was obvious that the mead was beginning to wear off.

By the time the knights were sitting around a campfire, eating scarce provisions of apples and bread, Gwaine had grown completely silent which made the night considerably more pleasant for the rest of the group.

It was cold. The fall had set in quickly, even bringing snow twice already. Arthur pulled his red cape around him as he stared into the fire. None of the men said much, nothing more than remarks about getting more fire wood or about the state of Sir Gwaine, who had fallen into a drunken sleep some time ago.

Arthur did not want think about Merlin but his thoughts always gravitated back towards his trusted manservant and what had befallen him. Even though he was unsure of what Morgana had been doing to the undeserving man, Arthur was positive that it was not pleasant. Not at all.

* * *

Merlin woke to the painful burning of his shoulders and a dull pounding in his head. _Healing magic_, the sore warlock thought to himself, _worse than one of Gwaine's famous hangovers._

Though a comfortable position was impossible, Merlin found some relief in shifting some of his meager weight to his feet, but it did little to help the overall discomfort he was feeling.

Morgana, who was standing at the hearth in front of Merlin, turned to face him at the sound of rattling chains as he tried to adjust.

"Sleep well?" She asked in that falsely sweet voice that seemed to have completely replaced the sincere one that Merlin used to know.

Merlin almost broke his oath from the previous day but stopped himself from responding. _Morgana did not deserve a response._

The silence obviously made Morgana mad. She needed Merlin to speak. He was there for some purpose, surely, even in her crazed state the witch would not risk so much just to keep Merlin for torture?

"Oh Merlin…" Morgana let out a dramatic sigh. "Surely you cannot keep this up forever."

Merlin's face was as hard as the steel in a blade.

"Fine, have it your way." Merlin thought that the witch would go back to ignoring him for the time being but he found himself sadly mistaken when a sharp pain suddenly sent him reeling back. Frantically looking to see what had caused the pain Merlin was surprised to see a dagger sticking out of his side, just above the scar that had formed from the previous attack.

The warlock gulped down his pain and clenched his teeth together. The dagger pulled itself out Merlin's flesh and hovered in the air before him. There was a sickening chuckle from the now motionless Morgana.

"Where should it go in next? Hm?" She turned to look at Merlin, insanity lighting up her face. "How about… the shoulder?"

In an instant there was an icy pain that erupted from Merlin's left shoulder as the dagger plunged into his skin. He kept his eyes planted on Morgana. The look of satisfaction had gone from her face, replaced by one of pure hate.

"WHY? WHY DO YOU KEEP SILENT?" She screeched, launching herself across the small room to stand in front of Merlin.

Morgana put her hand on the hilt of the dagger imbedded in Merlin's shoulder. Slowly, deliberately, she began to pull the blade out of his flesh but then stopped. With a vicious grin the witch twisted the blade in his skin.

If Merlin had never felt true pain before it must feel like this. His shoulder burned like it was on fire. In a moment of weakness he shut his eyes tightly to help cope with the pain.

_No!_ The young warlock thought with determination. _Don't give her the satisfaction!_

Morgana hissed in annoyance at Merlin's silence. She pulled the knife out of his shoulder and let it fall to the dirt floor with a dull thump. The scene played out the same way that it had the previous day. Just as Merlin thought that the evil witch was going to let him die she fetched the Druid woman to heal him.

In all truth Merlin would rather die. The healing was more painful than the actual injuries this time around. The young warlock tried his best to keep his face expressionless as he worked to stifle the scream building in his throat.

But then it was done, and Merlin was left to hang limply as he recovered from the most recent bought of torture. Morgana seemed to suddenly lose interest in the raven-haired man after chaining the Druid woman to the wall once more.

She walked past without a glance and went back to whatever she was doing at the hearth. Though his mind was still clouded with pain and confusion Merlin took the opportunity to talk to the Druid.

_Who are you?_ He reached out with his mind. _Why are you here?_

_Emrys._ The woman's voice floated back into Merlin's head. So soft, so sweet. _I am sorry Emrys._

Panic suddenly filled the warlock. _You mustn't call me that here! Morgana cannot know my true identity. _

_Calm yourself Emrys. Morgana cannot hear our talk. I have managed to block her out completely from my thoughts. _

Right, you never answered my question… Why are you here? Who are you?

_I am Hanna. I was a simple healer when I was taken from my village_.

_A Druid village?_ It was a strange thought to Merlin, who had only ever seen the Druids as nomadic people.

_Yes. I come from far away, Emrys. Magic is not as hated in other places as it is in Camelot._

Merlin involuntarily winced_. Sorry. I am hoping to change that though._

_I know that Emrys. But for now we are at Morgana's mercy. Though I fear there is no such emotion in that creature._

_Do you know why she's brought us here?_

_I'm afraid not. She's said nothing to me other than what you heard. But may I ask Emrys, why do you not scream?_

Merlin pursed his lips at the question. Why didn't he scream? It surely hurt enough to elicit a scream, yet he always forced them down.

_I guess… that Morgana isn't worth it? It's what she wants. She takes pleasure in the torture and wishes for me to show my pain, so I don't._

There was a gap in the conversation. Merlin wondered if he had said something foolish.

_You are a brave man, Emrys. And I am truly sorry._ Her voice was so full of regret that it sent pangs of sorrow through Merlin's heart.

_For what?_ He asked gently.

_For healing you. I know the amount of pain that you were in._ _I could hear your screams. In your mind. _Merlin thought back to the terrified look on the woman's face before.

_There is nothing to be sorry for… but I promise you this Hanna, Arthur will be coming to get me soon and he'll save you too, you have my word. I'm not a knight though, so the word of a servant will have to do for now._

For the first time in their conversation, Merlin turned to look at Hanna. She was strikingly beautiful with long black hair that cascaded around her pale face.

_Thank you Emrys. You are truly too kind._ Hanna turned to meet Merlin's gaze, staring back at him with the greenest eyes he had ever seen.

**I'm writing this sort of two different time-lines. The first, Arthur's perspective, is on the actual "here and now" time-line for the most part while Merlin's perspective is going to be flashbacks for awhile longer :) Hope I didn't confuse anyone too badly...**


	4. Chapter 4

**Wow I am so sorry! I accidentally thought that the end of chapter two was the end of three and just did repeat of 4! Fixing it now:**

Arthur awoke to the sound of Gwaine snoring inches from his face. Somehow during the night the king had managed to fall asleep. It was early, but it seemed that Percival and Leon were already beginning to stir. Arthur ducked as a boot flew across the camp and hit Gwaine in the face.

"What is it!?" The drunkard sat up and bellowed, frantically searching around. "Oh my head!" Gwaine lay back down against the rolled up cape he had been using as a pillow.

"That's what you get for spending your life in the tavern!" Percival, the owner of the boot called back as he came to retrieve his lost footwear.

The night had not been kind to the king who, for the most part, had grown used to sleeping in his comfortable bed. It had been several months since he last spent a night not on the soft mattress and the pain in his back eagerly confirmed his thoughts. Arthur pulled himself up and examined the state of his knights.

Elyan was just beginning to wake from the commotion while Leon was already standing by his horse, ready to continue their ride. Arthur smiled inwardly. That was Leon, always at the ready, always charging forward.

In a strange moment of clarity Arthur couldn't help think about how the knights seemed to balance each other out. For each strength there was a shortcoming and for each shortcoming there was strength. Yet, the group seemed oddly unbalanced. There was something missing, something needed to tip the scales to be perfectly even once more. Merlin. The king felt a hollow pain in his chest as he finally wrapped his head around the gap Merlin had left in his life.

It would have been appropriate to cry, to scream in rage, to do something to show just how angry and sorrowful he was but Arthur did none of those things. He was the king, and no matter how bleak the situation, he could not show weakness. Not yet.

"Sire?" Leon put a hand on Arthur's shoulder, shaking him slightly to bring him out of his thoughts. "Shall we continue on?"

Arthur cleared his throat and nodded, clasping Leon's outstretched wrist to pull himself up.

"Prepare yourselves. We should be upon Morgana within hours, do not under any circumstances underestimate her." The weary king announced as he made his way to his horse. A feeling of foreboding filled the air between the knights, one that they had been trying to cover up with the playful banter for the whole of the trip so far.

* * *

Arthur reined his horse to a stop when they finally reached the small village that brought news of Morgana. The simple, mud and stick houses with thatched roofs reminded Arthur of Ealdor. Thoughts of Merlin's little village brought back the painful memory of his missing friend that the king did all he could to push down.

As the group approached a few villagers had gathered at the rough wooden fence that surrounded the whole of the small cluster of houses. They had looks of worry and apprehension on their faces, though it was understandable considering that many of them had probably never even seen a knight before, let alone the king of Camelot directly on their doorstep.

"Your highness!" A black-haired older man stepped forward out of the group and bowed so low that Arthur feared he would fall over.

"Camelot thanks you for your efforts in fighting the evil of sorcery." Arthur started on his usual speech, though he knew that the villagers were not interested in his words of thanks. Carefully the king pulled a small pouch from his saddlebag and tossed it to the older man, who had managed to right himself. The bag jingled with the telltale sounds of gold as it landed in the man's gnarled hands.

"Oh no your majesty we couldn't possibly-" The man began to speak in protest but the king simply held up an impatient hand, all-too aware that every moment wasted was one that Merlin would have to suffer for.

"You say you know where the sorceress Morgana resides?" Arthur's horse shifted under him almost like it was trying to shy away from the name he had just spoken.

The man stepped back into the group of people and emerged again dragging a very frightened boy by his arm.

"This is my son, Genrick. He knows where the witch has been living, he'll take you there." The man roughly patted his son's back with a look of pride. Arthur, on the other hand, pursed his lips.

"He's no more than a boy, surely must be joking!" A strange look of hurt flashed across Genrick's young face.

"No… I want to help." Genrick's voice was still high-pitched with youth. Arthur looked apprehensively from the boy to his knights, who also seemed concerned about taking such a youth on such a dangerous mission.

"Very well. Lead on then, Genrick." The boy beamed with pride when the king spoke his name and rushed ahead towards the tree line of the forest.

Arthur clicked to his horse and set off behind the boy, a strange feeling beginning to settle in his belly. At first he couldn't identify it, just feeling. It was only when the forest was upon him did the king realize that the feeling was one he had not felt in a very, very long time. It was fear.

* * *

When Merlin felt the cold of consciousness begin to sink in he kept his eyes purposefully closed and tried to keep his breathing steady, listening for sounds of Morgana. It had been several days, or at least several new bouts of torture and the young warlock was beginning to grow wise to Morgana's habits. She would only bother him when he was awake, so he spent most of his time pretending not to be.

Suddenly something impossibly cold drenched his body and Merlin's eyes flew open despite his resolve to not react to Morgana's torture. The witch stood in front of Merlin, a wicked gleam in her cold eyes. For the first time he was suddenly aware of the terrible pain in his shoulders that protested his weight.

Struggling not to show his distress the tortured warlock met Morgana's gaze once again.

_Emrys… stop. _Hanna's voice floated into Merlin's mind. She sounded horrified. Merlin ignored her pleas and kept his eyes locked onto Morgana's.

"I see that we're still doing this, then?" Her voice sickened the raven-haired man and he tried hard not to pull his mouth up into the enraged sneer that it caused to build inside of him.

Morgana let out a very long, dramatic sigh. "Merlin. We were once friends, I liked you Merlin. That is, before you tried to kill me, stopped me from assuming my rightful place as Queen and killed my sister." The crazed witch spat at Merlin, who couldn't help but let a small smile creep up on his face.

Either Morgana didn't notice the grin or chose to ignore it because the next thing that she did surprised Merlin to the point of bewilderment. She pulled out a piece of bread and held it before the warlock's mouth.

"Eat." The witch touched the bread to his lips. The smell of the loaf filled Merlin's nose and, for the first time since he had been there, he realized how hungry he was. But this was Morgana. Offering a kind gesture?

_No_. Merlin thought, pursing his lips so that none of the bread could enter his mouth, despite his hunger. _This is a trick, a trap. It must be poisoned._

Coming to understand that the man was not going to eat the bread willingly Morgana put it to her own mouth and took a small bite, deliberately chewed, then swallowed. Merlin eyed her carefully as she did so, still suspicious of the morsel of food she offered him.

Morgana put the bread to Merlin's lips once more. He could feel the saliva from her bit clinging to the crust, making his stomach turn with disgust.

"Eat." She spoke again, this time much softer, like she was coaxing an animal. Reluctantly, Merlin took a bite of the bread, no longer able to contain his hunger.

It was stale, at least two days old and already beginning to taste of mold but Merlin ate it all the same. In fact he gobbled it down so quickly that the when he was finished his stomach began to turn and he feared that the bread was going to come back up.

The moment that the warlock had downed the bread Morgana disappeared through a coarse wooden door. Sunlight streamed into the normally dark hovel and illuminated the dirt floor, filthy bed pushed against the far wall and ash-filled hearth, forcing Merlin to realize just how far the witch had fallen. It seemed that she had gone from the fine silk dresses and polished floors of the castle to nothing but dirt and darkness. It sent a strange pang of sorrow through the young warlock's heart to see someone who he used to regard as a close friend in such a state.

_Morgana brought this upon herself, Emrys. Never forget that. _Merlin jumped as Hanna's voice drifted into his head. He glanced over at the woman who was staring back at him intently, green eyes full of sorrow.

_There must have been something that I could have done though. If I had… If I had tried to help her could she have been saved? She was alone, afraid, the ward to a man who spent a majority of his life hunting down magic. If I had helped her then maybe_- Hanna started to shake her head sadly.

_You cannot spend your days dwelling on what might have been, Emrys. You can only look towards the future and hope that it will be brighter than the past. It is all that we can hope for._

Merlin pursed his lips in doubt. _Albion?_

Just as Hanna's response began to drift into Merlin's mind Morgana reentered the hovel and carefully shut the door behind her, blocking out the sunlight and returning the space to its normal darkness. The witch was carrying something in one hand as she approached Merlin, who in turn had put back up his mask of blankness.

"Drink." Morgana instructed, opening the water skin she held in her hand and raising it to Merlin's dry lips. He obeyed, ignoring the obvious thought that the water it held would be poisoned in the same fashion that Merlin had poisoned her.

But after drinking nearly half of the water in the skin nothing happened to Merlin. He felt fine – well, as compared to being poisoned – and soon began to realize why Morgana had offered such a gesture of kindness in light of the situation.

It wasn't kindness. Morgana needed Merlin alive. She wanted information, and if the raven-haired man died of starvation he would be of no use to her.

Merlin watched with irritation as Morgana went through the same ritual with Hanna, only instead of bread the woman was fed a small piece of meat and some cheese, followed by the rest of the water in the skin. He felt a sudden pang of guilt for the Druid, knowing full well that if he had not been captured then Morgana would not have made Hanna a prisoner too.

_I can get us out of here._ Merlin reached out with his mind to Hanna, who after eating had started to drift off to sleep. The druid woman looked up, wild-eyed at Merlin.

_No you mustn't Emrys! Morgana cannot know that you have magic! _Hanna pleaded with Merlin, momentarily swaying his resolve from moments before.

The young warlock watched Morgana leave the hearth and lay down on the dirty cot on the opposite wall. This was the first time that he had seen her sleep, and it made a perfect cover for their escape.

_When she falls asleep, I'll break my bonds, we'll escape before she realizes what's happened._ Merlin tried to reassure Hanna but she shook her head, looking terrified.

_No Emrys you don't understand! She'll catch us and she'll be madder than ever!_ With that Hanna squirmed against her restraints and let the sleeve of her dark robe fall down to reveal her arm. Anger flashed through Merlin's mind when he the remains of a terrible burn on her pale skin.

_I'll kill her!_ Merlin unconsciously struggled against his bonds, feeling the familiar magic well up in his chest, threatening to erupt due to his rage.

_Emrys you must calm yourself!_ Hanna's voice sounded urgent. _Do not do anything rash!_

Merlin breathed deeply through his nose and closed his eyes tightly, trying to calm his anger. Finally, feeling himself grow more under control and the burn of his magic in his chest dissolve he reopened his eyes to see Hanna staring at him, quietly shaking.

_Such hatred Emrys._ The young warlock did not want to meet her gaze, he suddenly felt ashamed.

_I'm getting us out of here. Tonight._ Merlin said, still forceful though much softer than before.

**I feel really bad about the mixup and I hope people will check back to see the new chapter :/**

**Now for the same news as the repeat had: I'm going to be putting this story on the back-burner for now. Not stopping it, just focusing on another one that I'm working on and really got into for some reason. I still have quite a bit of pre-written stuff for this story so I'll continue posting until that runs out and hopefully write more... Thanks for reading :)**

**Oh and by the way a HUGE thank you to all who reviewed, favorited, and followed this story. It really makes me want to write more and better when I read all the positive comments -love-**


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